Swine Flu ain’t got nothin’ on me ::

April 28, 2009

I was chatting with my old man in gmail today about this whole swine flu pandemic insanity and was presented with a startling revelation. I know this isn’t specifically about Hong Kong, but I had to share. Not often does one get such insight into himself via gmail chat

Dad: Pandemics and epidemics are nature’s way of thinning the herd, so to speak, of the population…

4:11 PM in fact, YOU benefited from catching a virus when you were about five years old…
4:12 PM ‘Benefited? WTF? Are CRAZY, old man?” Why, not at all…it has been proven that viruses are a driving natural force in improving the function of the mind/brain…
4:14 PM You were sick as a dog and when you came out of the hideous flu your IQ had been pushed higher by the bug! You were talking, putting ideas together and just generally better at EVERYTHING you did after that attack.
4:19 PM me: wait….
I had a higher IQ after I was sick?
Can we infect Congress?
Dad: LOL!!!
me: 😀
Dad: I’d inject those idiots with perhaps too much!
4:20 PM
Dad: Oh yes, you were DEFINITELY more powerful intellectually…it was very noticeable and exciting and a bit scary…
Dad: you can query your Mom about it…
me: that’s weird.
4:21 PM you guys never told me that.
What else haven’t you told me?
Was I abducted by aliens?
Dad: The doc said there was something to my theory about this back then…
Naw…
4:22 PM you WERE, however, struck on the head by the backroom beam in the Camera Shop when I tossed you into the air and you hit it!!! But that may not count…
me: lol
Dad: you LOVED to be thrown into the air and, preferably, snagged before landing off the runway, as it were.
4:23 PM yeah. I thought I’d really skulled you but as a hard-headed (last name), you shook it off rapidly and returned to being your newly intellectual self.
On second thought, you probably WERE abducted by evil aliens from outer space.

I love my dad, he’s obviously awesome, and this is only part of the reason why.
What did I learn today? Infected shortly after birth with a nasty flu made me smarter, only to be dropped on the head. Swine flu? Bring it on.
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4 Responses to “Swine Flu ain’t got nothin’ on me ::”

  1. Dave Says:

    Hit on the head as a child? Explains a lot.

  2. Mr. Nby Says:

    Your Dad sounds like a fan of Malthus’spositive checks on population theory.

  3. babybmr Says:

    Yes, Chris, as your mother I can confirm that you did have a huge leap mentally after every high fever you experienced. Your dad liked tossing you in the air, and you loved it, however, doing so put me in an instant state of anxiety. I was so afraid he’s throw you too high and you’d hit your head, or worse yet, he might not catch you.
    I can tell you tho’ that you were NOT abducted by aliens, and the high fever = becoming smarter theory was only effective until you turned 13. After that, it worked the other way. Fortunately, you weren’t sick often. Love you always, mom

  4. Jeannette Says:

    How do I get a high fever? I want to be smart!!!


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